The Return

Its time to come back into the kitchen. Armed with experience, age, and knowledge, we are able to conquer the Gornaeth and their serpentine masters. Join me. Join us. Let us take back the kitchen.

Beholding a Frozen Crucifixion Of Hateful Snacking

I did not take a picture of this. Because I ate it. But, listen.
Take 1 can of chicken breast. Add 2 tablespoons of pesto sauce. Mix well. Eat with spoon.
High protein snack of the darkest gods.
Enjoy.

Chunky White Sauce of the Demon Beast

This is fucking obnoxious

From the hellish maw of the Wasatch I strike at thee with the evil might of the white sauce of the Demon Beast. 

Reagents:
1 pound breast of the flightless fat bird
5 strips of the cheapest bacon
1 pound green trees
1 cup of Alfredo sauce
Garlic powder, pepper, salt to taste.

The Ritual
Get a pan
Put it on the burner
Cut bacon with scissors into pan
When bacon is done add chicken
When chicken is cooking add your spices
Add the trees. Broccoli. Whatever
Stir in Alfredo sauce and use the powers of hell to simmer.
Pour this alchemical mixture into the skulls of your enemies.
Eat.
Makes two servings
Or four if you're weird.

Filling Peppers with Nocturnal Hellfire

Ingredientsss:
6 Greenbell peppers of unholiness
2 pounds ground beef
1 can diced tomato
2 jalapeno peppers, chopped in the ritual of Gal'takor
Garlic
Red Pepper Flakes to taste
Italian seasoning because fuck it
Sea salt
Shredded cheese
1 12oz box of mushdooms
A tablespoon of butter makes the medicine go down

What you do:
Preheat your incinerator to 350
Brown the meat
Add the jalapenos and mushrooms
Add can of tomatoes
Spice it up
Cut the tops off of the peppers
Tear out their guts
Put some cheese in the bottom
Spoon the beef into the green peppers
Top with cheese
Bake for 30-45 minutes
Consume.

Hailing the Nefarious Fungus Overlords of Yuggoth

INGREDIENTsS:
6 Stuffing Portobello mushrooms
Enough soft cheese to fill them.
A few sprinkles of cheddar bovine secretion.
Six slices of fresh jalapeno.

WHAT YOU DO
Preheat your sacrificial incinerator to the fires of hell. Abour 400 degrees.
Stuff the peppers like a virgin sacrifice
Sprinkle the cheddar on top
Place a slice of jalapeno on top of each
Bake for 20 minutes or until done.